We have travelled as a couple. We usually get along, and if there is friction we have learned that we have to deal with it immediately; someone has to give a bit and maybe we have to – gasp! – change the plan.
We have travelled with my wife’s sister L. She is extraordinarily accommodating, and that is essential. This made for some challenging work finding suitable sleeping places, but we managed. Last trip, L went off by herself one morning, and another evening I went to a different event than the others. But gosh, don’t take a third person who’s inflexible or cranky. And ask yourself if YOU are the one who’s inflexible and cranky (hey, if you are, don’t change, just plan around it.)
We have sometimes met family and friends as part of our trip. This works best if you meet somewhere you all want to go anyway. And as a detailed planner, you may find it frustrating that not everyone wants to do what you planned. This is where it’s good to find options, such as an art gallery across from a mechanical museum. Go ahead and split up. Eat together, sure, but you don’t HAVE to go everywhere as a unit. Let the fast walkers or slow shoppers go off separately.
If one of you really wants to do something and the others don’t, it’s OK to split up. Maybe if that one isn’t you, you can facilitate by helping your soloist work out how to get to their special place and then rejoin you smoothly.